Thursday, 29 November 2012

Letters to God #6

'Please, I want so badly for good things to happen.' - Sylvia Plath

Pieces of Letters to God

Hi Big G,

How are You doing today? I'm going to gym in a bit, which is pretty much the only thing that's working out for me. I spend most of my days pretty much looking forward to gym - it's a cool drug to be addicted to as far as I can make out. It's much better than my addiction to coffee.

Tell me, Big G, what's Your workout routine like? It must be hard finding a sparring partner or someone to spot You. No one can claim to understand #GodWorld problems, You're pretty much on Your own. If You ever want to grab some ice-cream we can do that and I really don't mind listening.

Mother's sick and she's quite stubborn in her ways - which are unhealthy ways. She doesn't look after herself and that's not working out well. I'm worried and don't know what to do. I'm not the best son at the best of times. It's like that dude who wrote Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, Edward Albee is it? That guy. He said that his adoptive parents weren't good at being parents and he wasn't good at being a son and so they parted ways. I don't think I want it to come to that. I like my people a little bit. May I please have some guidance in this area. Thanks a lot.

'I wanna be the best who ever did it
Don't know if that goal is feasible, or it isn't
But if it is then God, if you're listenin'
Please grant me the strength to crush all competition
You can't blame me for dreaming, I'm a dreamer
And if I'm coming off brash please forgive me
But, that's all I want'

- Eminem on Slaughterhouse's Our House

I'm working that inspiration angle like a geometer! I'm in my writing lab everyday now, working on a mixture of words that matter and carry enough weight to uplift hearts. I'm trying to discover the God particles that make up the words that will bring contentment to my soul. I even got a tattoo that reads: Imagine on my wrist to inspire me to sit my ass down and imagine new, shiny horizons on my keyboard. I've mucked up a lot and continue to do so - it's a hard tangle to get out of but I want to flip that shit and become a laptop toting media ninja, killing folk with sneaky insights into everything nerdy entertainment. Please keep giving me the mana potions to blast down media doors and write well.

'I am over 25
And I can't make a name for myself
Some nights I break down and cry'

- fun., One Foot

I don't even know what to say about my other pursuits hey... Life, love, money, drugs, beer and all the rest. It's a murky puddle I frown upon every morning. Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold. I frown. The other night I thought about killing myself with a shoe or something. My sister says You're against that sort of thing though. So no shoes then?

'Oh my God! Have you listened to me lately?
Lately, I've been fucking crazy...'

- fun., Some Nights (Intro.)

I've also let some very good people down lately and I'm sorry for that. It's not my intention to ever hurt people so please send them all some good vibes if You can. Well, I know You can. I guess I mean if You think it'll help. I'm sad about this.

I'm re-visting Middle-earth and that's nice. It's like that Mandela 27 years thing where I imagine he felt every inch of his struggle and it all felt very righteous. The Elves make their sorrow in their struggle against Morgoth seem cool, they make it matter more than everyday pain. My sorrow always just feel lame - just like my life sucks and that's it, there's no other purpose there. Anyhoo, Middle-earth is a nice escape from the day-to-day crap of my so-called real life. If You're in that sort of mood please send me a The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe sort of adventure. I'm too old, I know but it would be nice. Or You can send me my ex-therapist, Ursula. She was cool.

"Please keep giving me mana potions..."
It's always pretty rad-ical talking to You and telling You about all the strange things that befall me. I imagine our creator/creature relationship in the image of a puppy bringing its master a stick because masters love sticks - it's cute. Have Yourself a great evening and and say hi to the Heavenly host for me.

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