Setting Fire to Life

Hello my furry friends,

First things first (never second): I love you guys! Each and every one of you. I love how beautiful, intelligent, patient and just generally awesome you are. I would like to marry each and every one of you guys and because I'm Xhosa-ish I can. I'll get cows and everything. It'll be nice.

Second things second (never first): I'm falling in love with this rag called life and I'm setting it on fire, arsonist that I am. My life pretty much sucks right now but God gave me amazing friends and some useful family members to help me on my journey to becoming the absolute best that I can be. If I'm going to set my life on fire I might as well do so with the best team available to me.

Phoenix Rising

Here's the bulletproof plan:

1. Land the epic librarian gig I've been gunning for all this time. I would be South Africa's best librarian. No question about it. Books, talking with and helping people are where it's (I'm not too sure what 'it' is) at for me. I am also interested in the Big Five literacy programmes that the City of Johannesburg's libraries host annually - that's my wheelhouse and all.

Jo'burg Libraries

2. Be money wise. The thing that always kicks me in the head all the time is that I am stupid with my money. I'm sad to admit that I'm too compulsive a creature and that I go too far in spending money on too many things that aren't important for progress in my life. That's not cool and I should stop it. Just stop it, Charlie. *the moving, wagging finger*

3. My new favourite real life hero is Pierre Spies. He's, like, so totally awesome hey. The man's just a tank whose life is on Wizard's Fire. He is the inspiration behind my new workout routine and health plan. This guy. He's rad-ical. I also want to buy a mountain bike and hit the off-road for that adventurous healthy sort of lifestyle.

Pierre Spies

4. I miss taking some time out, connecting with the 'verse and talking to the Big G. I should do more of that, more of the time. I miss You Big G, I miss our dialogue. Please forgive me for being silent for so long. I also miss C.S. Lewis and Peter Kreeft a lot. Those guys know God's heart very intimately.

5. Work harder. Work smarter. I'm the laziest person I know and it's my lethargy that's been the source of many a failure of mine. I'm also pretty dumb about how I work. I've no plan of attack; I just wing it, which ain't too efficient or sensible. This is one of the important tasks to get done.

6. Read more. A book a week keeps the ignorance away. I want to expand my reading material to more than comic books, graphic novels, horror, fantasy and sci-fi novels. I'm going to annihilate the 101 Books to Read Before You Die list this year. Bam! Just like that. Better and smarter Charlie, always a hit at upper crust parties.

7. Game more. I miss gaming and tech so much that my soul actually hurts. Gaming is to me what boobs (lol) are to awesomeness - essential dammit! I have so many titles to catch up with: replay Mass Effect and Mass Effect 2 in preparation for Mass Effect 3, Skyrim, Batman: Arkham City, Deus Ex: Human Evolution and many other titles beside.

8. Get my driver's licence. This one has been a thorn in my side for some time and it's time to be a road warrior and just do it once and for all. Get it out of the way as they say. Also, there's the fact that bitches love being driven around in cars and stuff.

9. Be adventurous and tick off exciting things on the impromptu (we'll pretend I know what that means) bucket list: surfing, sky diving, banging dirty hippies with ginger dreadlocks, climbing a mountain - any one will do - and winning fights against annoying assholes.

10. Finally, do some good for change. I'm a fan of literacy programmes so I'll do something selfless along those lines.

Okay. That's the list, give or give a few more items. Other than Pierre Spies, and a host of others, I'm being my own hero. No cape, no tights or cool Bat toys - just me.

Thank you for sticking around and indulging me my little speech. I ask only that you join me in forging (I like that word - and know what it means) an alliance of everyday heroes that set the 'verse alight by being super awesome at living our lives.

Fire Dragon

Also, happy Chinese New Year for tomorrow.

Cupboard Person of the er... Year

“The most wonderful of all things in life is the discovery of another human being with whom one's relationship has a growing depth, beauty and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing; it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of divine accident, and the most wonderful of all things in 
life.” - Sir Hugh Walpole

I didn’t think of her as an actual human person with hopes, wishes, dreams, feelings, boobs, cute lazy eyes and chutzpah.

It’s too early to make this person my Cupboard Person of the Year, I know, since the year has just kicked off but she will be a highlight no matter what else happens to me this year. So here we go: the beautiful and charming Nthabiseng Monyane.

Life is wonderfully wobbly and all sorts of wibbly and I love it for that very reason. You can never be too sure of what to expect from it. It gives you Joy and sunshine at times and grief and thunderstorms at others. That’s just the way it goes.

Once in a while, though, someone amazing happens and her beautiful soul enters into your life and throws your whole rhythm out of balance by exploding her galaxy into your soulstuff. It’s a beautiful moment that I wish I could capture and bottle. That’s not the way God’s multiverse works though and all I can do is hold my breath and enjoy the beauty of the moment. I can also write about it a little.

Life in its wonderfully wobbly proportions is sneaky like a ninja kitten and introduced me to Nthabi-chan as Asia – someone who left a comment on a post on this here blog a few years back. Of course I didn’t think anything of it back then, since I didn’t expect that we would be meeting at any point. I lack all sorts of foresight I guess. She was, to my mind, just another wonderful mind trawling the interwebscape. I didn’t think of her as an actual human person with hopes, wishes, dreams, feelings, boobs, cute lazy eyes and chutzpah.

And then she moved to Jozi and got in touch and we started chatting on BBM, plotting clandestine meetings in dark corners where groping might occur. We just hit it off like two red headed stepchildren (to quote my friend, Grant). Plans were plot and schemes were scam for the meeting day and they almost unravelled because of fresh fog fuckery on my side of things but we circumvented all of that and met for a drink last Friday. Needless to say that the meeting went well... Okay, I lie, the meeting was freakin’ amazing! This woman just made it into my headspace without any effort and it was one of the highlights of my life.

Plans were plot and schemes were scam for the meeting day...

I am grateful to the hooded and cloaked powers that be that I met Nthabi-chan and I look forward to at least a lifetime of shared experiences.

Welcome to the Beanbag my Lady Love, I hope you enjoy it here :)

Fuck It!!!/Back in the Swing of Things

This is what happened last week Saturday:

My first post of 2012 and I'm just fucking angry! I'm angry at myself, I'm angry at the world in general and I'm angry at the Big Fella in the sky. I wish I had a fist the size of Cthulhu to punch the living shit out of everything I gaze my eyes upon... or at least a chainsaw to just fuck shit up. That would make me feel all kinds of better.

The funny thing is that I woke up in a pretty good mood today and it looked like my day was going to be all sunshine and tulips. I was going to type up a charming post about nothing in particular, a post characterised by my Charlie brand of humour and all. But everything went downhill with one incompetent computer store owner named Steve fucking up my day by being a douche bag of note. I bought a PC from this dude for a friend of mine who was supposed to pick it up at my place but decided he's going to Mozambique instead. This wasn't a problem since he gave me the cash moneys for it and I still stayed in my own place. Shit hit the fan when my cash moneys stopped going the distance they usually go and I decided to move back home with my momsicals with my tail tucked between my legs because I'm an idiot and unlike Charlie Sheen I lose at life. I digress though. The point is I didn't have space for my useless friend's PC anymore so I took it back to the computer store selling it for half the price I had bought it for. Steve tells me to pick up the money today, to which I agreed without any worries but when I fucking get there today he ignores me for what felt like an hour and then tells me to come back later. At this point I just lost my fucking marbles. Why didn't he just say this when I walked into the store?! Fucking retard.

This, of course, led me to being angry about everything I've ever bottled up in 2011. Now I'm sitting here trying to get my rage under control but it's not really working. I have the urge to take this computer and its slow internet connection and shove at down someone's throat. Way to fucking ruin my day universe! Thank you.

P.S. I still want a bunny-chow after craving one for a long ass time now. But guess what!? I don't have the money for one. Fresh Fog Fuckery! Argh.



Today:

So I had a so-so week till I met someone I'll tell you guys about as soon as I get time to sit down and do this woman some justice on my keyboard.

Today is just announcements. I have big plans for this year, plans the size of Cthulhu and I'm going to be working my sexy ass off to get things done and packaged nicely for yours and my enjoyment.

The Apocalypse cometh and we gotta do epic shit before it knocks on the world's door (with the exception of South Africa, Australia and New Zealand - we're gonna survive that shit) and stops the party. So see you guys next week with the new line-up.

Have fun.