Shh... please don't tell anyone that I'm here. I'm a wanted man you see and this is the safest place I can find to gather my wits and prepare a plan of action. I understand that the festive season is a time for people to get together and make merry but they don't have to be so damn adamant about it. I am invited to a birthday party I'm really not in the mood to attend :( The guy who invited me promised me that there will be booze and girls. His idea of booze and girls is different from my idea of booze and girls. I'm quite certain what he really means to say is that there will be enough booze so that you might find yourself attracted to the giggling semi-ugly girls he will have lined up. This is not my idea of a party at all. I'd rather be on the beach watching the waves and talking to a beautiful girl who has a personality of her own. I know I'm being anti-social and it's not a cool thing to do but these people are so boring! All they do is talk about dull parties they've attended and dull girls they've slept with. All I want to do is sit under a tree and read Stephen King, is this a crime?
Sigh. I've got to go, someone has just spotted me :(
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