Letters to God #2

Dear God,

Pieces of Letters to God

Hello, I hope You're well today. It's raining here again, but that's in my head only. I guess You know that though, but it's still cool telling You all these mundane things. It's like in that Jeffrey Archer story where bargaining with the Turkish rug dealers over a cup of coffee is an enjoyable part of the interaction. I'm feeling a shade of colour between blue and green, I'm not really sure what that's about to tell You the truth. It's just one of those days.

I'm still waiting on that bottled inspiration. I don't mean to rush You or anything but it would be useful right about now. There are things that need doing in this little life of mine. Thank You in advance.

Then there are all these people on the social networks always trying to emotionally blackmail me into loving You. Silly things like,'If you love God you will forward this and if you love the devil you won't.' That irks me very much. It's such religious masturbation! Are You opposed to smiting a few of these people? I'm even willing to work for You in that capacity - just riding around smiting a few ridiculous people, Ghost Rider style (silly movies, those). Mind You, I've not given the whole business much thought and I might end up not enjoying it and whining like a girl somewhere down the line. I'm just saying.

Tell me, do You think I should be going to Church again? Don my dragon helm and go to the meeting with Your other soldiers? I'm not much of a team player or anything useful like that, but, who knows, I could be of some use and those guys annoy me only a little bit. I don't even get bored and only rarely do I feel like arguing with anyone's views. I'll take my queue from You on that one. Send me a crop sign or something. I don't know.

"Don my dragon helm and go to the meeting with Your other soldiers?"  

Clearly these conversations are going to be somewhat ridiculous on my end. I know You have a ridiculous streak too though, so this might be a good thing. I look forward to those occasions during which we solve world hunger and then realise our plan is too elaborate to successfully implement. Travie wants to know what Your favourite brand is since the devil favours Prada and all. I want to know what Your favourite beer is and whether it's safe for Charlie consumption.

I'm feeling sleepy and Game's shouting in my ears about some city and the angels in it. I'm gonna go now. Have Yourself a great day. Much love. I'll pop in again soon.